Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
