Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
