They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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