I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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