Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
True strength comes from lack of pants
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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