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no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
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