Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
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