im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I deserve this hangover.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize