He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize