I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
