you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Randomize
