After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize