i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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