So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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