just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Randomize
