evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize