Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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