We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
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What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
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