He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize