Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize