I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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