She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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