How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
