lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
