Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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