What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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