Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize