Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
