he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
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