I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Randomize
