just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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