I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize