How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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