the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
