hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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