I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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