We tried having a conversation with our noses.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize
