So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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