Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Randomize
