from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
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Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
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I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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