Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
