went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize