I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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