I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
