Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
