Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
