I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd