Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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