I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Randomize
