Do you still have your period?
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
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