I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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